Erin Tillman

What young men should look for is not the potentially ambiguous absence of “no”, but the enthusiastic presence of a “yes, yes, yes” or affirmative consent. In 2018, “no means no” is totally antiquated. It puts all the pressure on the person in the most vulnerable position, that if someone doesn’t have the capacity or the confidence to speak up, then they’re going to be violated. If somebody isn’t an enthusiastic yes, if they’re hesitating, if they’re like: “Uh, I don’t know” – at this point in time, that equals no.